Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Wrestling with the Inner Saboteur

I love how my first reaction to the news that there are probably going to be commuting delays tonight and tomorrow was: Oh, I should probably not take the Metro over to my yoga class tonight… PA-LEASE. My sneaky mind will latch on to ANY excuse. Notice that I in no way focused on the fact that there will be anti-war demonstrations going on and that’s the reason for the possible delays. What does this say about me? Is it a reflection on my inherent self-centeredness? Well, I’ll take that one since I’ve embraced the need for a certain degree of selfishness to make myself and my goals a priority. The thing that bothers me is the rush to bail on my activity goal for the day at the slightest provocation.

I mean, I could do yoga at home. Or some other at home workout. That’s how these niggling ideas start. But the plan was to go to the studio and get a good Vinyasa class in. I just need to stick with the plan. I seriously doubt that the additional traffic on the Metro would cause me to not make my class. (Just wishful thinking at its most destructive). And I LOVE yoga. I always feel fantastic when I go. So what’s the deal? And all those work study credits I get from working there a few hours a month continue to stack up at an embarrassing rate. What am I doing it for if I wiggle out of going to the studio at the first whiff of an obstacle?

OK, rant over. Today, I win. I’m going. I will. I will not change my mind.

Am I the only one playing these silly mind games with myself? Does it ever just get easier to make the “right” decision? Please, tell me.

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